Mother's Day Dinner

Work was full of events today! Haha; apparently my coworkers have never before seen 'Asian' shoes. I was wearing a pair that I got like...three years ago?! And to them, it's very 'new'. Lol, China is probably laughing at us right now (: Anyways, I got a black cardigan (finally), but it's a size bigger =____= H&M said that they wouldn't carry anymore..so I got it. And they only had One size so why not? AND THEN, just when I thought I wasn't going to talk with him today---he texts me. Yeahh, I Know. It's not going to work out for another period of time but..I'll try. I lunched at Nordstrom Cafe and there wasn't any seats, except for this one next to a table of four girls (2 young 2 senior) And they were talking about how the two young went to China and how they "used their Chinese" [who says that?] and blah blah blah. Second generation-ers....like seriously? They SPOKE English in China? It's like they WANT to get jacked. I finally realize the importance of a second language a) you can use it in desperate measures b) you WILL NOT seem like a foreigner--therefore you fit in more c) people compliment you on it (: it feels really good! So today my family celebrated Mother's Day early at Tong Gong (Cantonese Palace? It's on Clement) and so my dad wanted to ask me what I'm going to do about my wisdom teeth (gotta pull em out this summer) and I told him in English and then my uncle said "say it in Chinese" and I did and everyone's like 'WOW, LOUISE'S CANTONESE IS SO GOOD!" It made me feel really good (: cause then my cousins and my little sister and older sister don't speak it that well. Apparently I'm 'tall' ? And my grandpa thinks that my hair is pretty hahha he spilled his tea on me. which is okay cause I was planning to wash that jacket this weekend anyways.

Ohh! And I also used my coupon '25 free 4x6 prints' for Ritz! The quality is pretty darn good! Well...the ones that I used with my T90 that is...the rest seemed sorta pixelated? Matte finish or glossy? Cause I got the matte ones...I figured if I wanted to put them in an album, the glossy ones may stick.

That's about it for now! I should get started on hw (:

Never Before Told.

I've never told you just how much I care for you. Funny, cause I thought you would reassure me that you felt the same way. But maybe that 'care' I feel for you is just in a friend way & in no other way. My friends were talking to me after school today. I told them about you & they caught you looking/glancing my way. Do you know how that little bit of information makes me feel? It lifts my spirits up and beyond the sky. I sound so stupid right now because I don't even have the courage to say it to you. AND THEN, to make matters worse--when I TRY to get over you...you keep coming on more and more. It's like you won't let me let go of you! So tell me, do you or do you not? I know you're shy, I know you tend to be that way around girls you like & you are hesitant, BUT--I've been pushing aside my feelings till you would somehow-someday reassure me that I didn't need to. Then, I talk with my friends online about how I am getting over you and they tell me about the other fish in the sea, speak of the devil, you im me. You tell me about your little plan to your mom. You want to surprise her and make a deal with her this Sunday to see if you can get that car of yours. You usually only come to me for those kind of things huh?

I think I really know how I feel about you now. I see you as a friend. A good one. Cause today, afterschool, totally changed everything. Other fish swam up to shore. I saw that it felt good to be around other guys. I'm sorry I can't give you ALL my attention.

So I hate that feeling where like I feel that, when I am talking to multiple people at the same time in real life, they are fighting for your attention. This ALWAYS happens to me. Like today! Branden & Johnson were totally going at it where Branden was speaking about Chinese and Johnson about why I wasn't eating his candy...lol Johnson cracks me upp. Branden too. People say that Johnson is 'HELLA MEAN' but he seems really nice when he's around me! I don't see him like that though. He just cracks me up (:

Summer will really help me get over it, NOT seeing your face NOT seeing that intimidating height NOT hearing your voice--I'll miss it, but it's for my own good.

Stupid

This could happen to me. I'm pretty sure that guys in my grade are like scared of me. I'm just going to be the same as I was. Just wait and wait till I am asked. I had my shot and I blew it. EVERYONE started going out after the dance...I'm kind of mad at myself for letting me fall into this kind of tycoon again...YET again. I always go for that type..why??? But no more. I have settled with myself. I am better on my own anyways. (: Like forreal. I know I want to find love, but maybe this place isn't the place for that.

Pokke

I'm not ticklish at all, but he is! Haha. He kinda just poked me today....that's about it. Nothing else. Not even a word. THAT GIRL; was trailing behind him again. Like no offense, but it doesn't seem like he's interested at all. It just kinda hurts. She's my friend too. Well, now it's just getting to my head which I should never let. I get him to myself tomorrow though! God willing...(: pretty please! He is just so CUUUUTE. Like no lie. really really cute! (: I can't help myselff. Sorry. So I feel that a lot of people are just saying blah blah blah it's between her and him, but it's not!!! It hurts me to see this guy like this. He's already done this to TWO of my friends. I'm sorry, but that's just a little too much. History repeats it'sself.

It's all in my head

Today has got to be the closest we have ever been; literally.

HIS HAIR...OMFG IS PISSING ME OFF BECAUSE IT'S STARTING TO LOOK LIKE THOSE FOBBY ONES FROM LAST YEAR...=____= no I cna't deal with that.

So let's start! It's the beginning of class and as soon as I step in there's a big HI or Hello...gosh I suck at these details. And then we walk up into the library. Our computer doesn't work..@ first I thought he wasn't going to sit with me but then it totally changed. So we moved over to where John and Wilson were sitting and we had to share a computer. Which was okay-la. So I bring a chair and he brings one, but I didn't see that there was already a chair there ... the table over there was pretty darn tall! So yeah I carried mine back. We start our project and what not. HE SLEPT @ 2 AM. Which would totally explain the fact why he wasn't on yesterday. He leaned on my shoulder :D because of his tiredness and he almost rolled off. That was in my dream....except....I was the one leaning on his shoulder........ ugh. I know. But hey! can't always come out the way I want! So then like he started poking my sides and seeing if I was ticklish or not. And I totally am not. HE IS THE MOST TICKLISH GUY OUT THERE. Which is kinda weird, but hey! Whatever.. so John tells him to look over on his screen and supposedly there's this picture of a guy doing something really REALLY disturbing? I don't know. But John wanted to show me but he kinda nudged me and said NOT to look cause it would ruin me or whatever (: That felt so good, cause he actually wanted to prevent me from looking at somehting LOL; never heard of that huh? Russell was coming and we were on my tumblr and then he alarmed me by telling me to switch the screen. ((: Yeahh, good day. HIS SKIN omg I just wanted to like SCRUB EVERYTHING OFF AND LIKE SMOTHER HIM IN LOTION BECAUSE IT'S DRY, AND THERE'S LIKE BLACKHEADS....lol he told me to stop looking at him. HIS CHINESE NAME HAS LIKE 4 CHARACTERS BECAUSE HE'S TAISANESE! How come I don't get four characters? I"m taisanese too! 1/2....He was going to tell me but then...the topic changed. And then we headed outward and he started telling me about this girl and how he saw her around school but then all of sudden became friends or whatever. And he asked me if that was weird. Well, I guess I have a few friends like that but as long as she's good to him I don't mind. The tree has officially been cut off. I just need the apple to rot. But I think it has already started because when he was talking to me or whatever I just don't feel that same spark anymore. I really think that ALL OF THIS; IS ALL IN MY HEAD and no one else can see it or feel it. Maybe he does because I just feel that he does! Look at that picture! He did that himself...in class today. Yeah yeah I know. It really is all in my head.

So like, when he was typing the login for the computer he almost* put in ildeng LOL but my login is lodeng ROFL so i was like...mann, he remembered my sn!!! :D and then before I headed up to Lando's he was like "Louise!" And I turned around and was like yess? And he was next to me and i thought he was gonna hug me or something and he goes like "where are you going?" and I'm like third floor and he's like ohh, okay bye and lol i'm not sure if those are his exact words but whatever! just knowing the moment happened is good enough for me xoxo

home sweet home

My parents have already decided that we are going back to Guanzhou, China in 2011!! My senior year's summer, aka the summer before college, which will be perfect timing cause then I can buy all the things I need at a low cost for my dormatory or whatever (: . Yeah, I'm cheap like that. But why do I want to use more money for the same product? Didn't think so! I really REALLY miss it. China is like my home! Hopefully, I get to go to Tokyo, HongKong, & Guangzhou. I love EVERYTHING about those three places. I loved all the SHOPPING, I loved how I lost weight so easily because you always went out during the day and at night. (: gotta love those faux brands too! They're startng to look really real! I miss the INTENSE heatt; the crowded places, yummy restaurants, riding the speedy subway, taxis, going to actual screenings @ my uncle's work place (I ALMOST* got to be in a show once), getting to know all these cool people, & most importantly; I miss all the family I have over there. Heck, My own grandmother doesn' t even remember me...I can wait another 2 yearss (: Sure I can. My aunt promised to bring me to get my earspierced too! Life seems to be going GREAT for me; I got into all the classes I want and there's not much that can stop me from basking in my happiness.